quarrel

 

 

"GO AWAY!"

A shout from the royal Chamber of Highland Kingdom, and a maid rushed out from the room, shut the double doors quickly, and after that, she heard a sound like something was thrown behind the door. The female servant closed both her eyes, her hands were still at the knob, shaking.

"What happened here?" An older maid came, reached the maid who still leaned before the huge door to the royal Chamber.

"Madame," she said with trembling in her voice. "It's queen Jillia again."

"Excuse me." The older woman said, and the younger gave her the way to the door. The older maid knocked the door. "Queen Jillia, are you alright?"

"No!!! And I thought I had told you to go away!!!" The soprano voice behind the door screamed.

"Queen Jillia, you have to eat, It's not good for the baby in your womb." the maid advised again.

"Who needs this baby!!!??" she thundered. "I don't need this thing! No one needs this thing! No one will care for this thing! It had to be killed! It's a child of a monster! If it won't die, I'll kill it myself!"

"Queen Jillia!" Both maids gasped, they opened the door forcefully, and saw the once proud princess of Highland was pointing a piece of broken vase to her stomach. The older maid managed to shout. "Queen Jillia!!!? What are you doing!!!!???"

"I'm going to kill this son of a monster! It's not worth for anyone!!!" She was shouting at the top of her voice, her hands shaken, and the there were floods in both of her forestry eyes. "I'll kill this thing!!!!"

Both maids dumbfounded at their places. After a few seconds, the older maid ordered in a whisper. "You, call the guards, quickly." The younger one seemed to understand and ran quickly as possible, while the older maid looked at the shattering queen. "Oh, god, why this has to happen when the king was away?"

"Don't move!!!!!" Jillia yelled once more when the maid tried to pace closer to the queen. "One move and I'll kill this thing!" She pointed the piece again to her womb.

"NO!!!" The maid shouted.

"You won't dare to do that, Jillia." A voice commented from the entrance of the royal Chamber.

Queen Jillia and the maid turned their body to see the ruler of Highland, King Jowy Blight, with Culgan and Seed at both his sides. The maid threw a questioning glance to her subordinates, who were there too.

"I wanted to call the guards, but I met King Jowy." The maid answered, nervousness in her voice tone.

"Thank god." The older maid praised in a silent tone. "He came back faster."

"Oh yes I can!!!" She cried out loud, fastened her grip to the piece of vase, the weapon she had in her hands. "I will kill this monster, Jowy! How dare you impregnated me for another monster to this Highland!"

"If you kill the baby, you'll kill yourself, Jillia." Jowy said with a flat tone. "You won't dare to do it!"

Only one second, Jillia launched her pale white hands that held her weapon, to the target. The maid swore that she almost saw death in front of her eyes, just when King Jowy's strong right hand grabbed the piece of vase from Jillia's hands and made wounds to his hands instead of Jillia's stomach, just then the other hand made a strong noise from Jillia's right cheek, leaving his mark there. Yes, he slapped his wife.

"You---!!!!" He screamed. Jillia eyes were empty, like she didn't say anything Jowy had said. Her face was directed to her husband, but she didn't see him, and tears coming from her green emerald eyes. "You can't live yourself like fool to live in this world!!!"

"How could you say that..." Jillia whispered between her sobs, so clearly that even the maid in the entrance of royal chamber could hear it. "...You raped me... I'm not different from my mother..."

The room was in silence. The maid felt a hand touching her shoulder. She turned and saw Culgan made a sign to get out from the room. The two maids switched glances for a moment, they realized that this sight they had seen must be forgotten from their mind or they kept as a private secret, they nodded and made their ways off from the room, leaving only the king and queen of Highland, and both leading generals of Highland army.

"I'll born another Luca Blight..." She hissed again. "A monster that lived in war between two sides, and trapped in it! A monster that would be filled with hatred!" Then her eyes were clearly pointing to her *husband*. " Or I would bear your descendant! Another fool fiend who use all ways to reach its goal, and I would see another me crushed, and born another, and another, and it won't end!!!"

"Jillia, how could you have that in your mind?" Jowy reached for her shoulder.

"Don't touch me!!!" She hit his hand. "Don't ever touch me again!!!! I had enough of you!!!"

"Jillia, I thought it's settled---"

"What was settled!??" Jillia cut his voice, her eyes were burning in flames, flames that burnt the whole forest in her eyes. "I couldn't believe you say that when you had raped me!!!"

"Jillia, please calm down."

"I won't---" then her voice died. He caught her in his save arms. He checked the pulse at her neck, then he looked up, and found Seed with his sword's scabbard, which had knocked Jillia down.

"I need to do that." Seed answered his questioning glance. "And you and her need it too."

Culgan tapped Jowy's shoulder. "Let her calm down for a while, your highness."

Jowy closed both his eyes, tightened his cuddle to his wife. "Yes, I think so too."

***

His once-he-called wife is sleeping now, peacefully bellow there, under the flowers of spring. And she will keep on sleeping.... even in the hot air of summer, the strong wind of autumn, and the cold snow of winter.

Usually, she always woke him up in the morning, giving him a morning kiss, and a prayer so he could come how safe and came back in her calm arms.

Yes, she is sleeping now, but it's different from that time...

***

"What happened to aunt Jillia, uncle Jowy?" Pilika asked, tugging the ruler of Highland's leggings. She was round-a-bouting his body, touching him, trying to make him notice her, but somehow Jowy's eyes were occupied to his wife, now laying un-conscious on the bed. And the royal doctor was opening her clothes like that.

He somehow wanted to scream; "Only I can see my wife's body!", but that wasn't wise thing to do at this time. He watched the doctor seriously, almost too serious...

"What happened to her?" Jowy asked soon after the royal *trusted* doctor finished his examination. This time, Pilika didn't bother her beloved uncle.

The doctor released a deep breath. "Well, it seems that---"

"I don't need *seem*." He said, flat. "I need an exact answer."

The doctor gulped and reported with a same flat with Jowy's previous. "I can surely say that she was stressed." The doctor didn't continue, only receiving a questioning glance from Jowy. "Well, maybe she has a lot of things in her mind... It always happens to pregnant women everywhere."

"How could she have a lot of problems?" Jowy asked, making a note that she was the queen of Highland, she could order anything she wanted, she couldn't be stressed out.

"I can't answer that." The doctor sighed. "But I can say to your highness, that she's a woman first and a queen second. Anything could happen."

***

I couldn't say anything after that, and the king of Highland himself didn't ask anything from me. But I could tell that he was shocked when I said that. My words my haunted the king's mind... Oh poor king, I could tell he loved Jillia so much, I could see it in his eyes. I also glad that the little Jillia who always cried when I examined her teeth when she was a child, had found the man who she loved, and loved her...

But, king Jowy's mind had been occupied by several things, he also had problems in his mind. He didn't accompany Jillia enough to be his *husband*.

Poor little Jillia, was born because the previous queen had been raped by the Alliance rebels when the king Agraes was away. She didn't know who her father was, hated by his own brother who saw the act of crime to his mother. Raised in a royal jail, without any love...

I remembered very clearly when the previous queen was raped, it was the reason why Luca Blight hated the Alliance so much.

... But the Alliance didn't deserve his hate...

I walked away from the room, after I finished, making an excuse to the king and the little child he and the queen loved so much. But he seemed far away, didn't listen to my excuse. So, I stepped out from the room, leaving the heavy atmosphere that was inside, praying so queen Jillia would have her happiness...

***

"GO AWAY!"

A shout from the royal Chamber of Highland Kingdom, and a maid rushed out from the room, shut the double doors quickly, and after that, she heard a sound like something was thrown behind the door. The female servant closed both her eyes, her hands were still at the knob, shaking.

"Again?" the older maid asked when she reached the place where the younger maid was.

The younger maid nodded. "I was trying to serve lunch when she suddenly shouted at me."

"Where is the King when this happens?" The older servant massaged her temples. "Thank god we changed all the plates and glasses to steel-ware and all dangerous items had been moved from the royal chamber. She sighed in delight, proud because her own attempts to fail another suicide by the queen.

"Umm..." The younger servant felt a little uneasy.

"What?"

"The lunch is... steak?" She nervously said, forced a joking tone.

"What do you--- Oh my goodness!" The older maid cursed. "You put the knife?"

The younger maid nodded.

"Queen Jillia! Queen Jillia!" The older maid rushed, knocking the door forcefully. Then she tried to open the door, and then she knew that it was... "Locked..."

"Queen Jillia! Queen Jillia! Open the door!!" The older maid repeatedly hit the huge wooden door. "Queen Jillia!!!"

"It will be over." There was a whisper from the other side of the door. Both maids suddenly dumbfounded. "When it's all over... I'll..." Those were the last words they heard.

The both maids then tried to open the locked the door, kicked it forcefully, but still, it wouldn't budge and still there was no answer from inside. After a few minutes, they shrieked... Flows of blood coming from the other side, under the door.

"GUARDS!!!! HELLLPPP!!!" The older maid cried for help.

"Excuse me, I want to greet the queen goodbye." A voice suddenly interrupted their cries. "What's going on here? Why are you all shouting like that?"

"Sir Sasarai!" The older maid jumped in surprise. "The queen!!!!"

"What happened to---" Sasarai then saw the blood under their feet. "By the runes!"

***

"Miscarriage." The doctor said.

Only with that one word, Jowy felt his heart shattered into pieces. How did he feel when L'Renouille gave the fastest man to the front line, informing that queen Jillia Blight had tried to kill herself with what...? Knife for steak meat? It must be hard for her to slice her wrist meat with that spiky thing, so she could create a flood of blood in their room. Pilika was crying hard after she saw that much of blood...

"Oh." He commented dryly, as if he knew from the first time that she had a miscarriage. She must be happy now... "What about her?" He mentioned his wife, with her pale white skin, lying hopelessly on the bed.

"If we're few minutes late in rescuing her, it's not only the baby but also her." The doctor explained again.

Jowy nodded, and looked for Sasarai who was also at the room. "I wanted to excuse myself because I was going back to Harmonia, but---"

"Thank you, Sasarai," Jowy forced a smiled. "for saving her."

The high priest of Harmonia countered his smile. "Well, I must excuse myself."

***

After Sir Sasarai had gone, I also asked my permission to go. Again, the king didn't say anything. He only took a chair for him to seat beside the bed, holding his wife's bandaged hand. The little princess also was tired, she slept in the king's lap.

Well, I thought that was the bravest thing the queen had ever done... And also the most humiliating thing...

The past Queen Sara, was truly raped... and although the late king forced her an abortion, but the queen still defended her baby. Every new life must be defended... She never thought anything negative to the baby in her womb... but, her own daughter... My baby daughter...

***

The full moon was set above L'Renouille, giving its silver light for every corner of the dark castle, Highland capital, including to the royal chamber...

Queen Jillia opened her eyes, felt her husband's hands on her wounded one, he was asleep... beside her, holding her hands... and in his lap there was the little pink princess, little Pilika... She forgot about her presence all this time... She was so peaceful... and her husband too...

She sighed, fighting all the tears she had in her eyes. She closed her eyes tightly, silently hoping that the tears would disappear if she did that, but it couldn't... The tears coming down to her pale cheeks, to her chin, and she continued her quiet sobs...

"Jillia?" Her husband's hands moved, and he was now looking her worriedly. "Are you alright?"

She didn't bother to turn her head to see his deep oceanic blue eyes. "I did it, didn't I?" She asked with her shaking voice.

"Fool." His clean smooth hands that she knew, dirtied with bloods of people he killed in the battle, erasing her tears from her eyes. "You made the decision by yourself, why are you crying?"

"I don't know." She sobbed again. "I wanted a child so much... but... I think I'm afraid..."

"Why are you?" Jowy released his hands from Jillia, making Jillia felt empty, he was removing Pilika from his lap, carefully, he brought her to the big couch near the bed, and covered her with a blanket, kissing her cheek, and made his way back to his wife's side.

"I'm afraid of another war." She continued. "... I..."

"That is not reasonable." Jowy held her hand again. "War always happens everywhere, and there're many tragedies we have in this world, that Kalekka incident in Toran, the Toran Liberation War, including this Dunnan unification war..."

"We can't do anything to stop that?"

"No."

"Funny." She closed her eyes again. "I was trying to kill the fire-starter of the next war, in fact I killed it."

"Jillia..."

"So, what are you fighting for?" Jillia asked. "You said by yourself that this country had betrayed you, why do you fight in this country's side? Even using me as a tool to get the throne---"

"Jillia, I thought we had---"

"Don't cut me. I know you love me, truly, but that's not your motivation to marry me... That's not the factor that push you to porpose me, my husband... You're marrying me, because you're needing the way to be a leader as soon as possible, to have the same position like your friend, Genkaku's descendant."

Jowy widened his eyes, he fastened his grip for her hands in his.

"That hurts." She cried with a low voice.

"I'm sorry." Jowy relaxed.

She laughed bitterly. "I'm right, aren't I? Hhh---- I thought this was over for me..."

"No, Jillia, I won't let it over for you, you still have Pilika, me, and your dreams."

"Dreams?" She stopped for a while, like searching for something... some words. "You're right, but it cannot be fulfilled." She started to cry again.

"Jillia." He came forward to kiss her eyes, tried to drink all her tears, as if would lessen her sadness. "You're emotionally unstable at this time, the doctor said you have to sleep well, don't think of anything and get enough rest... please? Please, I promised to make you happy, didn't I?"

"Jowy..." She raised her head, so her lips met with his, sharing the heart the had together, mending the broken pieces, trying to comfort themselves with an endless kiss...

***

Harmonia, IS 465, there was a fire in a village near the border of Harmonia-Jowston State. The fire started at a civilian house, and continued until it burnt the whole village down... 15 people died, and 376 people wounded and 74 people were still in coma.

It was a cold autumn, the dry wind blew fast. It was the same damned wind that spread the fire in the village, 3 weeks ago.

21 years old Jowy Atreides was standing in front of a stone-tomb, few meters behind was the descendant of Genkaku, the one who should lead Jowston State, and his sister Nanami. The child, Pilika, now was almost teenager was still lying in the bed, in coma, waiting for the time when she could talk and walk again...

...while the person who should accompany her, here, was lying in a different bed, in a wooden coffin, beneath the cold red solid soil of the earth.

The accident happen just before the three childhood friends wanted to pay a first visit to the former queen of Highland, after a few years, wanted to surprise her and her adopted child... and when they arrived, they only saw black dust all over the land, replacing the green prosperous village...

......... They have never thought things would be like this... Well, we could never see our future... can we?

"Jillia." Jowy kneeled and whispered, touching the cold gray stone. "We wanted to surprise you... Are you surprised now?"

Nanami then couldn't hold her tears more, She sobbed on her brother's shirt, her brother hugging her, also trying to fight the tears that gathered in his brownish eyes.

"Well, I know I was mean to you... you know, leaving you in this place, but I promised I would be back... here I am." Jowy then took a deep breath. "We explored the whole world, you could name it, Toran, Grasslands, Nameless land, Falena, and others." He traced the chiseled alphabets on the stone...

Here lies Jillia Blight,
IS 445- IS 465
Rest in Peace
A mother, a friend, died for protecting
the ones she loved...

He trailed the fonts, didn't find a word that supposed to be there... A wife, his mind didn't protest this, because Jillia was no one's wife since the very beginning... His hands somehow stopped in the *Blight* Latin letters.

"I promised to make you an Atreides... and I found this when I was in Falena..." He reached his pocket, and took out a small black box. He opened it, the shine reflected its reflection on the shining golden ring. "I wanted to ask you if you would marry me again, so you could be Jillia Atreides."

 

 

Atogaki:
and this fic is dedicated to anyone who read it and my schoolmates who are going to graduate from Tarakanita (girls only) Catholic High School in about 2 weeks, June 19th, and *officially* June 23rd. I'm going to miss you all, I won't say goodbye to you all, See you again.

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